Today was the day. We had our first ultrasound after starting injectables. I’ve been injecting 75 iu of folli.stim since CD3 (it’s CD 9) and we have 4 follicles ladies and gents. They measured at 14mm, 12mm, 12mm, 12mm and my lining is at 9. All of this is good, friends! The nurse sat me down to talk to me about the possibility of another follicle coming out (5…) and maybe having to cancel the cycle. I told her that we were not into selective reduction, and that my husband and I would discuss what we want to do. I’m waiting for the Doctor to call me back to see if I’m keeping on my dose or not, but the great news is that The Man will be around to give a fresh sample, instead of us using the cryogenically superman-type sample he would otherwise have to leave.
Score 1 for injectables.
Possible bonuses: I might be able to have my IUI on a weekend (seriously, when does that EVER work out?!). When we do IUIs I tend to take it easy and have a sick day. I don’t want to do anything that’s gonna mess this biznass up, and I like to think that if I sleep afterwards, it makes it more like the “real thing” (TMI but yes I do love a good snoozefest after a romp…). So my weirdo rationalizations all lead me to believe that odds could be really good this cycle… BUT:
(cue doom and gloom noise/evil laughter)
4 follicles means an increased chance of multiples. I know lots of people who think that twins are your way of getting a 2 for 1, getting it over with, completing your family in one fell swoop, etc. While I would feel INCREDIBLY blessed to have twins, I understand that there are more inherent risks for me as their mother (labor, bedrest, etc. etc.) and that there are more inherent risks for them as inhabitants of my little uterus (less room, possibility of being premies, less attention from me). Not to mention the fact that our dog would totally lose all of our attention-right away, but I digress. And that’s just thinking about twins- not triplets or quads. I know that odds of triplets or quads are slim, but the odds of being infertile aren’t really giant either, and we all know the odds weren’t in my favor on that one.
So… I’m feeling cautiously optimistic and hoping the following things:
1) These follicles continue to grow at their lovely pace and have rock star eggs in them (FERTILIIIIIIIZE)
2) That no other follicles come out of the pack and “catch up” which would end in a cancelled cycle
3) That no matter what happens for this IUI,
if when we get pregnant (which I really hope!!!) we are able to be healthy and handle the outcome with intelligence, calm, and foresight
4) My insemination happens on Saturday (because I’d love to not miss work- did I mention I have Monday off, too!)
5) That we have strong swimmers who are worthy of Olympic gold medals. (If you’re asking, I’d prefer the Ian Thorpe types to Michael Phelps, even though I don’t want them to backstroke, I don’t want them so high/laid back that they miss the target).
As we all know- we can wish and hope for whatever we like, but there’s a lot out of my control.
When I remember that I’m not in control I repeat this mantra:
positive thoughts equal positive results; that which you imagine is made manifest.