And so it begins…

I was “dated” yesterday. Sometimes I wish the infertility world didn’t have all these weird words/acronyms. Anyway…

We are doing this. I am officially on day 2 of BCP (I had to call the nurse to ask her which pills to take because I’ve never taken BCP and had no idea which pill was “active” and which one wasn’t…). I complete my final dating today and go in to sign consent forms- like yes we agree to IVF and where we “will” our embryos if we both die (morbid). I also give them a FAT CHECK for the payment for these services.

On that note… my husband and I have been really wavering on whether or not we should do the Attain program. Most TTC’ers I’ve talked to said, “duh! no brainer to Attain”. Basically we would be paying about $26,000 for 3 fresh/3 frozen with a baby or a refund at the end. To me, the whole business feels just like that- a business and makes me feel yucky. At this point we are writing a check for $11,300. We decided NOT to do Attain. And for a variety of reasons, the first being I responded well, I am young and we are really hopeful. The second is that, for 2 IVF attempts out of pocket we are slightly under the Attain price and I’m not sure if I could take more than 2 cycles of IVF- mentally, physically, emotionally. So… that’s where we are now. I asked my husband if he would eat the cost if we wanted to do a third, and he said yes. He’s an accountant- so I thought he would be right up there in doing the least risk approach- Attain. But he has faith in this process, in our doctors and in my body. So I’m going to have faith, too. We are doing everything we can, I’m visualizing healthy, vital eggs with beautiful embryos that will implant and get us to a pregnancy. We feel really confident.

We have also decided to only tell our parents and no one else. My husband is the main proponent of this, but I agree that no one needs to know the gory details of our conception no matter how it happens (in the bedroom with some sexy music, or while I’m sedated wearing “lucky” socks).  They seem to be pretty understanding, and have asked some questions- but aren’t getting too invasive. We basically told them that our odds are 1% naturally, and 5% with IUIs, and this will bring us to at least 60%… so we’ve got to give it a shot. We’ll also be doing ICSI which should really help with our issue. I’m now praying that I respond well, make really great, solid embryos, and that we have perfect implantation.

Suggestions on ways to prep are welcome, as are well wishes : )

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